Power and Control Wheel is a visual tool developed by the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project in Duluth, Minnesota, to illustrate the tactics an abusive partner might use to exert power and maintain control in a relationship. This diagram is widely used in educational and therapeutic settings to help individuals understand the dynamics of abusive relationships.
What Is the Power and Control Wheel?
The Power and Control Wheel shows how different forms of abuse work together to dominate, manipulate, and oppress a partner. It demonstrates that abuse isn’t always physical—it often involves emotional, psychological, financial, and sexual tactics to maintain control.
At the center of the wheel is "Power and Control", representing the abuser's ultimate goal. Surrounding it are the various abusive tactics that achieve this control.
Components of the Power and Control Wheel
1. Emotional Abuse
- Insulting, belittling, or humiliating the partner.
- Playing mind games or making them feel "crazy" (gaslighting).
- Making them feel guilty or undeserving of respect.
2. Isolation
- Controlling who the partner sees or talks to.
- Limiting access to friends, family, or support networks.
- Monitoring or restricting activities, including work, school, or hobbies.
3. Using Intimidation
- Making the partner afraid through looks, gestures, or actions.
- Destroying property, abusing pets, or displaying weapons.
- Using threats or physical dominance to create fear.
4. Using Threats?
- Threatening to harm the partner, their children, family, or pets.
- Threatening to commit suicide or hurt themselves if the partner leaves.
- Using threats of legal trouble, like calling immigration or social services.
5. Economic Abuse
- Controlling all financial resources or withholding money.
- Preventing the partner from working or sabotaging their job.
- Running up debt in the partner’s name or stealing their money.
6. Using Children
- Threatening to take children away or use them as power.
- Undermining the partner’s parenting.
- Using visitation or custody to harass the partner.
7. Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming
- Downplaying or denying abusive behavior.
- Shifting blame to the partner (e.g., "You made me do it").
- Claiming the abuse didn’t happen or wasn’t a big deal.
8. Using Privilege
- Treating the partner like a servant or subordinate.
- Making all major decisions without input from the partner.
- Exploiting societal privilege (e.g., gender, race, immigration status) to justify abusive behavior.
Visual Layout of the Power and Control Wheel
The diagram is typically a circle divided into "slices," with each slice representing an abusive tactic. The center of the wheel is labeled "Power and Control" to emphasize that all these behaviors aim to dominate the partner.
How to Use the Power and Control Wheel
- Self-Reflection:
- Use the wheel to identify if these tactics are present in your relationship.
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Acknowledge that abuse can take many forms, not just physical violence.
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Education:
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Share the wheel in support groups, schools, or workshops to raise awareness about abusive dynamics.
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Seek Help:
- If you recognize any of these behaviors in your relationship, consider reaching out to a domestic abuse hotline, therapist, or trusted support network.
Contrasting with the Equality Wheel
To contrast abusive relationships, the Equality Wheel highlights the characteristics of healthy, respectful relationships. Its sections include:
- Respect (listening without judgment).
- Trust and Support (encouraging growth and individuality).
- Shared Responsibility (equal decision-making).
- Non-Threatening Behavior (creating a safe space for both partners).
Where to Find Resources
- National Domestic Violence Hotline (U.S.):
- Website: thehotline.org
- Phone: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
- Text: Text "START" to 88788
- Love Is Respect (For Teens & Young Adults):
- Website: loveisrespect.org
- Women’s Aid (UK):
- Website: womensaid.org.uk
Key Takeaways
- Abuse is about power and control, not love or anger.
- Abuse can be emotional, financial, sexual, or physical, and these tactics often overlap.
- If you recognize these signs in your relationship or someone else's, seek help. You are not alone.